The New Economy 2 (The List)

In this post I'm trying to answer the questions from Jeff Rient's very useful list: twenty quick questions for your campaign setting. I left out a few as they were quite D&D-specific.

What is the deal with my cleric's religion? The big guys are still here. Maybe yer man is a Muslim, a Lutheran or a Buddhist. Of course there are more exotic types like the Church of Based Loathing whose adherents believe that loathing is the only truth, the Star-Druids who stand out in the rain looking for spacecraft, and the Unity of Perspective who hope to understand the world  by means of optics.

Where can we go to buy standard equipment? One of those flea markets down by the overpass.
Where can we go to get plate mail custom fitted for this monster I just befriended? A custom-fitted Kevlar vest will cost ya. A donation to the Anti-Scum Solution might help. They used to be riot cops, so they have the gear.

Who is the mightiest wizard in the land? Beff Jezos, post-human miracle man. He pisses confetti, shoots lightning and laughs at death. The c**t.

Who is the greatest warrior in the land? A lotta people talk big. Maybe it’s Big Rig Kimball, current chairperson of the public transport pirates.

Bring me my Chariot of fire.

Who is the richest person in the land? Leaving out Ascended Tech Daddies, probably Ewan O’Malley. He built the Beacon Acres gated community before everything went tits-up.

Where can we go to get some magical healing? A paradisical habitat on Mars. Bring back a pina colada.

Where can we go to get cures for the following conditions: 
Poison, disease. Find a Carer. There are nice people who’ll help you for cheap.
Curse. They say that drinking gatorade from a Tesla hubcap will bring you luck. Who says? People...
Level drain.  Get back on yer bike?
Lycanthropy. See that’s a mutation. A genetic change. It doesn’t come off.
Alignment change. There ain’t no cure for asshole.
Death. You just re-sleeve into a fresh body. No, of course you don’t have one.
Undeath? Go away.

Where can I find an alchemist, sage or other expert NPC? They usually live in lavish rent-controlled apartments. They’re really not much better off than you.

Where can I hire mercenaries? Find some Ganksters. They’re a like a murder-fraternity. Or rent some muscle from the Franchise. They wish they were the Cosa Nostra. They’re still bad news. Or rile up the locals.

Is there any place on the map where swords are illegal, magic is outlawed or any other notable hassles from Johnny Law? Gated communities. They’re guarded by psycho neigborhood watches with golf carts and assault rifles. You ain’t welcome.

Tactical golf cart.

Which way to the nearest tavern? They’re straining some kind of hooch through socks down in the run-down laundromat. Or if you don’t wanna die  you can bargain for some applejack with those urban farmer types. If you’re lucky they’re just smug hippies. Some of them are on some kind of Khmer Rouge Maoist death trip.

What monsters are terrorizing the countryside sufficiently that if I kill them I will become famous? ETTERKAP. It’s some kind of cute acronym, but what it is is an eight-limbed nightmare. A post-human consciousness in a bio-sleeve from hell fucking with us for sport.

Are there any wars brewing I could go fight? There’s ALWAYS a dumb turf war going on. Swole Heinrich’s gang would probably pay you to fight against the Anti-Scum Solution.

How about gladiatorial arenas complete with hard-won glory and fabulous cash prizes? Bedouin MC host cage fights in a former Toyota dealership. Last night I saw a Gankster with a machete fighting a million roaches in a trench coat. I swear.

That's entertainment.

Are there any secret societies with sinister agendas I could join and/or fight? Sure. There’s the Tunnel Lords who rule the sewers. There’s the Paper Graveyard who squat on public records like a dragon on a hoard. There’s the Getalong Gang who do ANYthing to get a hacienda in a gated community. Probably loads more.

What is there to eat around here? Street meat on a stick? Canned beans? A mystery kebab from the guy with the prosthetic arm? We live in a golden age of authentic street food.

Any legendary lost treasures I could be looking for? They say there’s a secret shuttle to Mars bringing entertainment and artifacts for the immortal Tech Daddies. If you found it you could sack paradise.

Where is the nearest dragon or other monster with Type H treasure. The Maggantuan, the pale worm of the sewage treatment plant is said to have a bellyful of jewelry, gold teeth, petty cash and the weapons of those who tried and failed. If it even exists...